“Trying to Slim Down?”

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I was out to dinner with my mother. We went to The Native New Yorker. It’s a hoppin’ place that has great burgers, sandwiches and darn good wings. We only been there once before. We sat in the bar. For Tuesday night, the place was pretty packed. But we found a nice table near the back and sat down.

 

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Soon, the waiter came. I would say he was in his mid-30s. Right away, I could tell he had a sense of humor. I’m shy, so I don’t particularly want to be conversing back-and-forth with my waiter. Don’t misunderstand, I’m polite and everything.   I understand serving is a really tough job. But I don’t want to have long drawn out conversations.

We order our drinks: a coke for me, a Miller Light for my mother. The waiter notices our table is sticky and says he’ll be back and clean it right away. He does so, as my mother and I look over the menu. The restaurant has a very good selection of food. It’s one of the very few places in which I struggle to choose what to order. I noticed a bacon cheeseburger. However, I decide I can’t order that because if I do, my mother will say something about my weight.

I settle on the “Turkey on the Rye.”

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It’s a better alternative, and there is absolutely no comment from my mother. She orders the Reuben. The waiter takes down our orders and comments that the food will be so good that he wants to sit down and join us. My mother and I nervously laugh and off he goes.

My mother and I make casual conversation as we wait for food. I don’t particularly like the bar for a couple of reasons. One, I’m not much for drinker. Two, I’m quite short and I don’t like the high-rise chairs or tables. But my mother enjoys a drink once in a while when she goes out to eat, so I’m happy if she’s happy.

Our food is brought out by a waitress. I see my mother’s Reuben. But, my sandwich doesn’t look quite right. I’m not one to send back my order. I don’t like confrontation and I don’t like making waiters or waitresses uncomfortable. There are couple very picky eaters in my family, and they always send their food back. So, I’ve grown accustomed to let little mistakes go by with no trouble. However, it’s the completely wrong sandwich. I’m very polite and tell the waitress that it’s the wrong sandwich. She apologizes and says she will go and fix it right away.

Our waiter comes by when he sees I have no food in front of me.

“Is there a problem?”

“But there was an error, they brought me the wrong sandwich.”

“I’m so very sorry sir. I must’ve written down the wrong order.”

I can tell he’s very embarrassed and feels bad about the mistake. It’s not my intention to make anyone feel bad and honestly, I have no trouble waiting for my food. I explained this to the waiter, everything is good, and I am happy to wait.

“Would you like a salad while you wait?”

I found this question quite odd. I didn’t anticipate waiting very long for my order, and I’ve never had a server pose this question when foods been wrong.

“No, no, no,. It’s quite all right, I can wait.”

“Ah, trying to slim down?”

I nervously laugh and tell him I’m fine waiting. The waiter says he’ll come back with my order’s ready.

It wasn’t until later that I actually realized what he said. I’m a bigger guy, and I wonder if his comment was innocent, a slip of the tongue – – – or if it was a jab at my weight. I really don’t know, but in thinking about it, I don’t think it was something he should’ve said. We are in an establishment that deals with food. Why on earth would you make a comment about a person trying to slim down? The waiter might’ve made an innocent comment, not trying to hurt my feelings.

But needless to say, I went home feeling ashamed. Do you think the comment was out of line? Should comments of eating less or more be made in a restaurant?

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